‘With my aura flapping like a dying salmon, I raise a glass to the life I have now vs the leather-skinned raver’s life I never lived’ – middle-age Balearics

Fomentera is a haven for artists and fun-lovers that puts emphasis very much on chilling out

Life's a beach - an aerial view over the Playa de Ses Illetes beach in Formentera

Joe Coyle

"I want to be a hippy and I want to get stoned…”

Look, I swear, it’s just a song lyric and it’s not a lingering life goal I’ve had since 1990s electronic musos Technohead dropped that head-bouncing hit directly into my teenage ears.